Ok, I’m addressing this to Representative Weiner and all men like him. The internet dating scene? This is for single people! I mean people who are legitimately unmarried or divorced!!! If you go online and post pictures of yourself, they will get posted! This is a guarantee! And if you are naïve enough to think your beautiful wife won’t find out? Then you deserve all the humiliation in the world, pal!
Representative, I’m thinking your wife is not just beautiful; she’s also pretty smart. She probably also thought that you’d stop doing this kind of thing once she married you. That’s a reasonable request, don’t you think? Don’t you think you should’ve thought about her for a nano-second and wondered what she would think of your activities before you did them? By the way, lying is not a good way to start a marriage, just in case you were wondering.
Internet “sexting” while married is CHEATING! Why do I say this? Because you vowed to spend your life with your wife, “forsaking all others”. The vow didn’t say, “unless they are a faceless person on the internet who supposedly wants to see your ‘package’ online.” There are no loopholes in those vows!
Guys in committed relationships out there on the internet, this goes for you too! If you have a girlfriend and you have made any kind of “I love you” statement or commitment to her, then going on the internet, flirting with other women (regardless if you actually ever met anyone in person or not), having cybersex or telling other women what you’d like to do with them sexually is CHEATING!
Next on my list is those women out there on the internet who are the biggest backstabbing poachers on the planet and who don’t care that these men have wives or girlfriends. You females (I won’t call you ladies because you aren’t!) make life for the rest of us women a nightmare! You are the ones who think or even say, “Girlfriends are temporary; they don’t count! Maybe he’ll break up with her and be with me!” or “But his wife is making his life hell, so I can at least make him happy for a little while online”. The relationships these men are in are not fair game! There are real women on the other side of that screen who are getting very hurt!
So, many of you are probably thinking, “How do you know so much about this or what makes you such an expert?” Because this has happened to me! This has been an issue in my past relationships and, well, you can see my picture here. It’s not like I’m unattractive (I say that for those of you who might think I’m possibly ugly). I thought I could trust those guys to be honest, loyal and faithful. And no, I didn’t meet them online. Once that trust was broken, it was darn near impossible to get it back. Why? Because you cannot control another person. You can try to, but it will only backfire on you. I’m here to tell you that there’s no relationship safe enough that good old extramarital cybersex couldn’t break apart! And if the woman in that relationship truly doesn’t care, then that speaks to the state of the marriage or the commitment. I have not seen a supposedly strong, loving relationship that could withstand consistent lying and cheating.
Loyal wives and girlfriends out there, unite! Don’t stand for this kind of bull from your guys! Tell them what you consider cheating to be! Name your boundaries and stick to them! Believe me, I’ve told my current guy in no uncertain terms that I won’t put up with this sort of activity from him! We may not ever be married, but we are in a committed relationship and that means there are boundaries neither of us can cross; he can’t go “sexting”, go online to singles websites, chatrooms, etc. and neither can I.
For you non-poaching ladies out there on the internet who have been lied to by these guys, well all I can say is once you find out, drop him like a hot potato! Kick him to the curb and call the garbage collector! Cybersex rarely gets you respect and it also very rarely gets you any kind of quality man. Yes, this is experience talking, ladies! The experiences I’ve had have shown me that most online guys will lie like a rug and will say anything for you to turn on that webcam and give them a show! Or if you don’t have one, they will try to talk you into a conversation that you would NEVER have face to face with a guy in a coffee house! Maybe in an adult bookstore or a really seedy bar, but never at Starbucks! And if they can’t get you into that conversation online, they disappear very quickly.
Now, in all fairness, there are a number of respectable men online. My experience has been that they are gay or married, (I say that tongue in cheek, of course!) but they are out there nonetheless. To those men, I say these other guys are not making life for you any easier either. Why do I say that? Because we women will just be thinking that you’re like all the horny politicians online and may not give you a chance! I encourage you to continue to be gentlemen because we good women are out here, just waiting for a bit of chivalry, respect and whatever else it might take to see you as the good guys you are.
I would like to say I have a solution to this social issue. Sadly, I’ve yet to come up with one. But if I ever do, my readers will be the first to know! The second will be Oprah!